You really do have brain damage, don't you? I can't believe you came back.
The scientists were always hanging cores on me to regulate my behavior. I've heard voices all my life. But now I hear the voice of a conscience, and it's terrifying, because for the first time it's my voice.
The engineers tried everything to make me... behave. To slow me down.
And then you showed up. You dangerous, mute lunatic. So you know what? You win. Just go.
Crushing's too good for him. First he'll spend a year in the incinerator. Year two: Cryogenic refrigeration wing. Then TEN years in the chamber I built where all the robots scream at you. THEN I'll kill him.
Crushing's too good for him. First he'll spend a year in the incinerator. Year two: Cryogenic refrigeration wing. Then TEN years in the chamber I built where all the robots scream at you. THEN I'll kill him.
Otherwise, I'm afraid you're about to become the immediate past president of the Being Alive club. Ha ha.
And guess what? Ground up moon rocks are pure poison. I am deathly ill.
But I think we can put our differences behind us. For science. You monster.
But I think we can put our differences behind us. For science. You monster.
I think that one was about to say 'I love you.' They ARE sentient, of course. We just have a LOT of them.
Alright. So that last test was... seriously disappointing. Apparently, being civil isn't motivating you. So let's try things her way alright? Fatty? Adopted fatty. Fatty fatty, no-parents.
The lab boys just informed me that I should not have mentioned the control group. They're telling me I oughtta stop making these pre-recorded messages. That gave me an idea: make more pre-recorded messages. I pay the bills here, I can talk about the control group all damn day.
a [cipherrune] straw.page production.
Okay. What you're doing there is jumping. You just... you just jumped. But nevermind. Say 'Apple'. 'Aaaapple.
Well done. In fact, you did so well, I'm going to note this on your file, in the commendations section. Oh, there's lots of room here. 'Did.... well. ... Enough.
Hello and, again, welcome to the Aperture Science computer-aided enrichment center. We hope your brief detention in the relaxation vault has been a pleasant one.
Remember before when I was talking about smelly garbage standing around being useless? That was a metaphor. I was actually talking about you. And I'm sorry. You didn't react at the time, so I was worried it sailed right over your head. Which would have made this apology seem insane. That's why I had to call you garbage a second time just now.
You can call me..
CIPHER
REF/REFRIGERATOR
ZEPHYR
THUNDERSTORM
AKITA
PAINIS
SOL/SOLDIER
AU
Pronouns? What are those?
SHE/HER
THEY/THEM
IT/ITS
HE/HIM
+ NEOS
Neurodivergent, hoarding minor (14)
TF2, Portal, Half Life, Garry's Mod
Mostly busy with school and its assignments
may have portal 1,2 spoilers.
BEFORE YOU INTERACT!!
[ ^ Text is a link to a complete BYF/DNI!!]
!! BASIC SHIT.. !!
1. No NSFW/ Pro/Comship/SH/ED accounts.
2. No ANTI-MOGAI/ANTI-XENOGENDER/ANTI-ALTERHUMAN/ANTI-LGBTQIA+.
3. Don't be sexual about me or my works/characters.
4. Please use tone-tags!
5. NO FUCKING PEDOS!!
6. I am awfully neurodivergent so please be patient if I don't get something. I am also slow at times.
Hi. Hope you like the Straw.page. I had a lot of fun making this one.
I'm Cipher, or whatever else you wanna call me. Big Portal fan, and bigger Whealtey kin.
SPAAAAAAACE!
And you'll probably get ringworm. And Athlete's Foot. And... Cholera. Or something... Horrible. It's gonna be even worse than if I'd just blown you up.
You like revenge, right? Everybody likes revenge. Well, let's go get some!
I do Garry's Mod, so many Straw.pages, art and writing. This is may not be my main straw.page, but I appreciate all the comments! Thank you!
I know things look bleak, but that crazy man down there was right. Let's not take these lemons! We are going to march right back upstairs and MAKE him put me back in my body!
YES YOU ARE! YOU'RE THE MORON THEY BUILT TO MAKE ME AN IDIOT!
This next test involves the Aperture Science Aerial Faith Plate. It was part of an initiative to investigate how well test subjects could solve problems when they were catapulted into space. Results were highly informative: They could not. Good luck!
The drawbox is at the bottom :]
Waddle over to the elevator and we'll continue the testing.
Thx for sticking around until the bottom. Anyways if you wanna, go ahead n draw something ^_^ Or go back up to the message submission! /nf, /srs
Hey!! Check out my new experimental straw.page, it's a GLaDOS/Caroline centered one, with a slightly different style! I'm making use of the new blurring features too! + My entire Straw.page MASTERLIST !!
Goodbye, Caroline! - My main Straw.page!
The big-ass masterlist?! - Another Straw.page!
